It's spring, tra la laaaa...... (*gunshot*)... La... la....

A housekeeping item. Just so's everybody knows, I was not the stalker lady arrested for almost running over Sandra Bullock's husband, Jesse James. First of all, stalking seems very counter to my cat-like, sleeping-17-hours-a-day life philosophy. Seems like a lot of work. Hell, even if I lived next door to them, it would be like, "Awww, man!?! I gotta put on pants, go out to my car, put the keys IN the ignition, drive 10 whole metres (meters, 'cause I'd be living in the United States), and deal with Mr. Lucky dodging me? I don't THINK so." Also, I drive a Bland Slam. If it runs over anything larger than a Tic Tac, something snaps off the goddamned thing. Of course, then I could probably kill Mr. James by virtue of the fact that he'd die from laughter as I try to wrestle with my P.O.S. car. So yeah. Hope that clears everything up. Also, I've forgotten how to do links, so I can't actually link to the news story, but the lady stalker is like 5'4" and blond. And I ain't.

Had an awesome day today.... I went to the Garden Centre, and spent a sh*tload on plants and potting soil and stuff. It is my plan to have a lovely, lush, soul-destroyingly plant-y balcony this summer. So I got pansies. Lots and lots of pansies. Go ahead! Make your jokes! I love pansies! They thrive on neglect, and they like the sun, and since the balcony is like one of those desert movies in the afternoon, you know, the ones where there are little heat ripples and mirages and stuff, I figure they've got a good shot. Seriously, though, I can't think of many more fun ways to spend some time than gardening. What I'm doing doesn't really qualify, but it's stilll very fun for me. I get so disgustingly excited about gardening, I thought they were going to have to turn the hose on me at the Golden Acres. "It's spring! Boo yah, mutha f***as! Awwww yeahhh....." On the other hand, I do get seasonal allergies. I was a seriously disgusting specimen this morning. Poor Malcolm (brother, "new" roommate) had to deal with me sprinting past him on the way to the kleenex, screaming, "Oh god! It's like a clown car!" I eventually got a handle on it by mixing a bunch of different cold and allergy medications. No more sinus pain, but holy gods, I was drowsy at odd times! I'm sure this weekend will give me lots of exciting and fun stuff to write about, so I will go out and be naughty and post all about it later!

I'm going home..... For goods, y'all!

Woot. Total Britney Spears moment there. O' course, I'm not gonna shave my head and go all, like, rehab or anything. That s**t is for quitters. Anyhoo.....
Announcements.
Much has happened in that last couple of weeks. I mentioned earlier that I was somewhat... disillusioned with my job, and was applying for other positions. Some in Edmonton, some in Calgary.
I gots a job in the Calgary. [I will interject here to say that if you did not hear this from my lips, it doesn't mean I don't like you. I have been trying to tell people, but also I've been trying to pack and stuff and it's been super-mega busy so please I hope no one's feelings get too hurt.] Much joy, much sadness. Sadness mostly because I have to leave some truly awesome, wonderful people who make Edmonton a good place to be. And that shows you how truly awesome these people are, considering my suggestion for the municipal motto, "Welcome to Edmonton. Sorry about the smell." [ed. note: This was based on a particularly pungent day downtown, wherein the exhaust from the many cars, combined with the lack of wind, made the place smell like ass. Really. And I don't mean burros. Of course I know that this was a freak occurrence, and happens frequently in other cities. But still. Ass, people.]
Anyway, this job will be awesome. I get to work with people and be highly organized, which appeals greatly to the OCD aspects of my personality. Also, I get to move back in with my wonderful, intelligent, funny, big screen TV ownin' brother. Ooh. He also got one of those vacuuming robots. It kind of scares me, but it does a great job.
What else.... I got my navel re-pierced by some very friendly, attentive men at WEM. They were very nice. One offered to impregnate me (as long as I wasn't married) and the other asked if I wanted to go hot-tubbing that evening. So sweet. Such nice boys...
I don't think I have any other news right now. But I'm also still not dressed and only on my third cup of coffee, so I might be forgetting something.