Thursday, March 27, 2008

Had my teeth fixed....

Now I'm even hotter than before. If that's possible. Which I don't think it is.
That would be a terrible country-western song.
I got steam-rolled by several things lately. No..... I'm not gonna talk about them. Except for one thing, which is really starting to irk me. Where is the justice in me, Ms. "Purell", Ms. Washes Her Hands After Touching the Railings or even just an Outside Door getting the flu AGAIN!?!
Come on! Fortunately, this was not the vomity flu. This was simply... er... mucus-y and fever-y and stuff. I know. Hot. Try to resist my charms!
The plans to relocate to more humid climes (Vancouver) are proceeding nicely. I have sent out several job applications. I have not heard back from any of them. I tell myself, "It's them. It's not you... You're fabulous. They suck. You probably didn't want to work for them anyway." I also tell myself, "There are 5 bakeries on the street you will be living on. Isn't it time you gave up pandering to the patriarchal oppressive dictatorship that insists you be a certain size... and weight... They have cookies...And oh my God, are those cinnamon buns?"
I see now that I will have to become fat and sassy in order to maintain my feminist ideals. I'm cool with it. I really hated jogging anyway.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Success!

Well, no, technically it's failure. But it's still success to me! I received my first official rejection letter for writing! From the Economist magazine!
I'm so hardcore. I think I have to go smoke a cigar or something.... And preen... Just smoke, and preen, and bask in my own brazilliance...